New Blog

Hello friends and family. In case you're wondering, I have finally begun blogging again. Catch me now at www.rosecardfaux.com. You won't be catching me here anymore.

Celebration: Waiting

I'm in the slow process of revitalizing the blog and consequently reviving my interest in it maybe. Stay tuned. And remember that absence makes the heart grow fonder.

Celebration: Good Health - Finally

After nearly a month-long sinus infection followed by another month where the cough just lingered and lingered and lingered and lingered and lingered--during which time I wasn't getting much sleep because I kept waking up coughing, I have gone almost a whole week without one single cough rising up inside of me. Have to say that I am feeling MUCH more interested in interacting with the outside world on a regular basis.

Good health is something I sometimes forget to celebrate. My thoughts usually goes like this:

Healthy? --> Gotta get stuff done, gotta get stuff done
Sick? --> Waaaaaa! Why am I sick? Who can I get to feel bad for me so that I feel appreciated even though I'm being a waste of space? Waaaaaa!
Healthy? --> Gotta get stuff done, gotta get stuff done

Or something along those lines. So when I am feeling healthy, mostly what I celebrate are things I do or things I encounter outside of my own body. My thoughts aren't usually, "Wow! What a wonder and a blessing to be able to sleep all night! Wow! I can have a whole conversation without my voice devolving into scratchy incomprehensibility! Wow! I can move my limbs without feeling like I'm moving through water! Wow! I feel NO pain right now!"

But this week I am thinking those things and I'm really loving it. So, if you're feeling healthy too, let's take a moment to appreciate the fact that the worst thing happening with your body today is that maybe people are pinching it because you forgot to wear green. If you're not feeling healthy today, hopefully it means people will refrain from pinching you, and that's something to celebrate too.

This is how I felt most the time for the past couple months (boy, am I glad to be done with that!):

My four-year old niece took this picture. She told me exactly what to do with my face. Maybe someday she'll be a famous photographer for magazines like Vogue and Harper's Bazaar. Also, if you've ever seen the movie Thoroughly Modern Milly, the situation with my pearls should be pretty funny to you.

Celebration: Some Silly Little Love Songs

In celebration of Valentine's Day, I'm sharing some of my favorite songs about love.

MY FUNNY VALENTINE. Performed by Ella Fitzgerald. The first time I ever heard this song, Jordan was singing it, and as many versions as I've heard since then, his is still my favorite. We may think we want someone to tell us, "You are the most beautiful, you are the smartest, you are perfection personified," but isn't it a lot nicer to hear someone say that even though you're merely human they like you just the way you are? That's why I like this song.

SONNET 29. Rufus Wainwright. Little known story behind this song: The Cosmic Director of the Arts, who is in charge of all the art created in the many universes, was approached one day by his arch-enemy and former childhood friend the Cosmic Director of Small Mindedness with the challenge, "I bet you can't make Shakespeare any better." The Cosmic Director of the Arts had just two words to say in response -- "Rufus Wainwright."



LOVE'S A GAME. The Magic Numbers. For those who may be without valentines this year, a song about the fickleness of love. But I dare you to try and feel sorry for yourself while listening to this song. Also, remember that I love you...just not in THAT way.

Celebration: Who Do You Think You Are

I don't watch a lot of real-time TV. I get my shows online, usually. But every now and then I sit down for some couch-style TV watching and this weekend I saw a show I'd never heard of before but was fascinating. The show Who Do You Think You Are traces the genealogy of a different celebrity every episode. Generally, I find the lives of celebrities only interesting in the gossipy sort of way that loses its intrigue quickly, but in the case of this show the fame of the main subjects adds to the emotional impact of the stories because you feel you know them (or at least a version of them) just a little bit better than some Regular Joe and so you feel just a little bit more invested in the story of their journey to discover their roots.

Watching the show made me think about what really makes up who I am and it reignited my curiosity about my own roots. Unfortunately the only episode on the NBC website is the Vanessa Williams story, which isn't as emotionally engaging because she doesn't seem as genuine as she could be, but if you watch TV on Sunday evenings, you should check this one out.

Celebration: Safety

Yesterday, while on a walk with my niece and nephew in my in-laws' neighborhood, I noticed smoke rising from the back of one of the houses we were passing. It smelled like the charcoal my grandpa uses in his barbecue so I thought that's what it was at first, that it had just gotten a little out of hand and started smoking. Then I noticed smoke had begun pouring out of the vents in the house's attic. And then I noticed smoke streaming out of the corner of one of the upstairs windows, and rising up to combine with the increasingly engorged cloud of gray smoke in the sky. I reached for my cellphone, but it wasn't in any of my pockets. Then I noticed that in the few minutes it had taken me to notice all these things my nephew, who has the energy of an antelope, had somehow propelled himself so far down the street that he was nearly invisible. It was a strange moment, where everything seems drawn out, slowed down. I felt the responsibility over my nephew's safety and the responsibility to address the emergency taking place in front of me, and the panic of not knowing how to respond to both.

Luckily, Jordan rode up just then on his dad's bike. He called 911 and I shepherded the children back to my in-laws' house. Some neighbors came outside to see what was happening and were able to get the owners of the burning house on the phone to find out what to save, and a neighbor broke into the house and rescued the dog and an urn. The fire department arrived quickly and immediately went to work. Luckily no one was harmed, though their tiny dog will probably never like the smell of barbecue again. Jordan's parents don't know the owners of the house very well, and the family will probably never know who exactly helped them out, but I was really grateful for Jordan's timely arrival on the scene. And most of all, I was grateful that everyone was safe. Since I was a little kid, the idea of fires like that has been darkly terrifying for me. Though it seems like the inside of their house was almost completely destroyed and they likely lost many things of sentimental value, it's nice to know that all that was lost were things.

Celebration: My Bizarre Dreams

Some of you may have heard about the dream I had a few weeks ago where Craig Ferguson and I were a detective partnership and Craig Ferguson kept insisting on dressing up in elaborate, unnecessary and very conspicuous costumes, usually ones that revealed huge portions of his masculinely hairy chest. I always have vivid, bizarre dreams like this.

Last night I dreamt that my sister Mitzi, Jordan and I moved into a house with a rather pudgy, middle-aged fellow who liked to dress up in drag (dress-up theme here?). For the housewarming party, to which many of the people from mine and Jordan's current and past wards (church congregations) ended up coming, our new housemate dressed up in a brightly colored, overly-feathered, showgirl outfit and performed the following dance:

He reached one feathered arm around a corner into the room where all our guests were gathered, and touched his pointer finger to a melancholy-looking picture on the wall while singing in low, solemn tones, "You...do..." Then in one fluid movement he ripped the picture off the wall to reveal a different, bright and happy picture, while simultaneously spinning into the room in a dozen perfectly realized pirouettes and singing loudly, triumphantly "SOMETHING TO ME!!!" Ending with his arms extended upward and outward as far as they could reach. It was quite a moment.

I remember the Dream Me feeling a little bit of his excitement and also a little bit embarrassed for him because it just wasn't the right crowd to appreciate this sort of thing, and hoping that people would clap. But I don't remember if they did.

I do hope that someday I learn to sleep better, but I sort of hope I never stop having these amazing dreams.

Celebration: My Awesome Author-Mom/Mom Who is an Author

Most of you who read this blog know that my mom is the author of a genuine published, in print, tangible, holdable, buyable, readable book called The Entomological Tales of Augustus T. Percival: Petronella Saves Nearly Everyone (click here or *here to learn more about it). This week she featured in my alma mater's campus newspaper, so I felt like taking a special moment to celebrate her and her talents and her book again, even though I've mentioned it before.

Click on the following to read the article: "BYU Professor Publishes Children's Book"

*I believe that her website was mostly designed by my brother and sister. So let's celebrate them too.

Celebration: Nerdboyfriend, A Genius Blog

This blog is, on one hand, seriously hilarious. On the other hand, it's also a great resource for some surprisingly appealing outfits for the men in our lives. Which outfit is your favorite and why?

Click here: Nerd Boyfriend

Celebration: Little Lights, by Ane Brun, featuring Syd Matters (because he does)

I was going to write a post celebrating some of the fun things that have happened in my life in the last few months since I haven't really done much of that lately. But instead, I'm just in the mood to celebrate this very pretty song by Swedish musician Ane Brun and her friend Syd. This song has given me many happy melancholy moments. Sit back and have a peaceful moment while you listen to "Little Lights":

Celebration: Freedom Derived from a Giant Cartoon Head Hiding Your Own Face

Whoever it is underneath this mask had better be getting paid well. How does he/she stay upright? (If you start to get bored, skip ahead to about 4:00 and watch my favorite part.)

Celebration: The Nuances of Vocal Performance

Last night Jordan brought home a present for sick little me, who has barely made it out of the house for more than a couple hours in total for the last week and a half. The present he brought was a humorous video that even now makes me smile. The story behind the video goes SOMETHING like this: User Axman13 posted a highly emotional and poorly spelled review of a flash game on some gaming website. One of the voice artists for the game then recorded a version of the review, pronouncing all of the words as they were spelled by Axman13. Then somebody made this clever flash video to go along with the voice recording. What really MAKES this video, though, is the perfect choices of the vocal performer.

Please enjoy:

Celebration: Giving and Receiving

I like pleasant surprises. For instance, gifts. I like preparing gifts for other people and seeing their faces at the reveal. That's part of the magic of Christmas and this year I definitely enjoyed that aspect of the holiday. Of course, it can be a little disappointing when people obviously don't appreciate their gifts as much as you want them to, but one of the best parts about giving to other people is the excitement I feel myself regardless of their reaction, so giving gifts is always worth it to me.

I also like receiving gifts. Jordan, who likes to give the perfect gift and tends to put a lot of time and energy into preparing gifts for people and sometimes would rather know exactly what a person wants in order to give the perfect gift, has found out that I don't want him to consult me in too much detail about his presents for me because the surprise is at least half of my pleasure in receiving. Why do I like surprises? I can't pinpoint the reason exactly, but I know a huge part of it is that sense of an exchange between two people, of seeing into the other person's mind and the way they see you, and understanding them a little better and appreciating them more.

Sometimes when I've received presents I've gotten too focused on wanting the gift to be exactly what I want and I forget the importance of that exchange with another person. When I was in junior high the shoe brand Vans came out with a series of shoes that were made of shiny fabric that was covered with even shinier plastic. My best friend got a pair of red, smooth sneakers, like a hip version of Dorothy's glass slippers. A girl on our bus also got a pair of red ones, but hers were finished in a reptile skin pattern. At the time I didn't have very many fancy clothes and those shoes seemed like the fanciest things a girl could own while still being cool instead of prissy. I wanted a pair so badly, and I wanted them to be that same deep red because it was just so pretty. Vans only had those two kinds of red ones, so when I was writing my Christmas list that year I opted to get the ones like my best friend rather than the other girl who I did not like very much at the time.

On Christmas morning I saw that shoebox-shaped gift from my grandparents and I knew what was in it. When I tore off the wrapping paper and saw the Vans logo on the box I was even more sure. Then I opened the box and inside were a pair of red, shining sneakers finished in a reptile skin pattern. I was so disappointed. I couldn't imagine going to school wearing the same shoes as That Girl. I pretended to try to be happy the rest of Christmas morning but really I wasn't trying at all; I wanted my grandparents to know I was disappointed. Finally my grandpa asked what was wrong. It was his turn to look unhappy, but I was focused on getting the exact shoes I wanted not on whether he knew how much I appreciated their generosity. That week he went and exchanged the shoes and I thought I was in heaven. Until my best friend saw them and got annoyed that I'd copied her. She never wore hers again.

It didn't take very long for me to look back on that experience and realize what terrible behavior I exhibited and how much less enjoyable Christmas was for me because I got so focused on getting those dumb shoes. There are probably situations when it's best to let a gift giver know that they got it wrong, but I think most of the time if that's where your focus is, you're missing the point completely. I think giving and receiving gifts is about looking at each other more closely and appreciating each other. I got so many great gifts this year, and I'm really grateful for them. But mostly I'm grateful for the people who gave them to me.

Celebration: A Christmas Miracle

This week I accomplished something I have never accomplished before. I completed enough of the book I'm writing to fill over fifty pages. Are they filled with literary goodness? There's some of that in there. Are they full of literary badness? I'd have to say that they aren't. Do they still need a lot of work? Yes, a whole heck of a lot. But I've never gotten so far in a book before. So that's a huge accomplishment. Now I can focus on decorating for Christmas and making sure I really do have everyone's presents ready.

Merry Christmas Miracle to me!

Celebration: Christmas Memory #2: Hot Wassail, Mood Lighting and Good Friends

I met my best friend in high school and she and her family have become like a second family to me. While she was on her mission I hung out a lot with her younger sister and that winter the two of us and sometimes some other good friends of ours (or other family, which were also our friends) would make a batch of wassail and sit cross-legged next to the Christmas tree and talk with all the lights out except the ones on the tree. Probably we were mostly gossiping about boys, but the light from the tree and the warmth of that wassail in our bellies made those moments seem magical and life changing. I'll always remember that feeling at Christmas.

I wanted to find a video of steaming hot wassail to put everyone in that magical mood, but can you believe no one's posted something like that on youtube? So here's an traditional Christmas song I've never heard before, but is sung by Loreena McKennit, who generally makes really good Christmas songs. I haven't decided if I like this one that much yet, though. Note: I've noticed those old Christmas carols really acknowledged the importance of food at Christmas, sometimes in impressive detail.

Celebration: Singing Christmas Songs in Church

I like going to church in December because it means we get to belt out Christmas songs with a whole load of people. I wish we'd add more Christmas songs to the hymn book though. Like wouldn't it be awesome if the congregation attempted the high notes in "O Holy Night" or crooned "Santa Baby?"

Here's a version of "Santa Baby" with a hilariously incongruous graphic. Try to picture the Relief Society president putting on this mood. (Or if you're not Mormon, picture your proper, kindly aunt trying it.) I know there's only part of the song here, but I'm tired and I don't feel like searching for a full version.

Celebration: Christmas Movies

One of the best parts of the Christmas season is Christmas movies. There are a few standards that I try to watch every year, like White Christmas and Love Actually, but I'm looking for some new ones to watch this year. Not necessarily ones that were made recently but new to me. For instance I watched The Christmas Story FOR THE FIRST TIME (Yes, that's right; the first time) only last year. So obviously my Christmas movie experience needs to be expanded. And I need your help. What are some of your favorite Christmas movies?

White Christmas is, I think, the ultimate Christmas movie. I wanted to share two of my favorite parts of the movie - 1) where Danny Kaye does the "Choreography" dance and 2) where Rosemary Clooney sings "Love, You Didn't Do Right by Me" - but I couldn't find those clips anywhere on YouTube. So instead here is another of my favorite moments (I shared the URL in one of my comments earlier, but if you didn't check it out then, check it out NOW! My favorite part is at around 1:30.):

Celebration: Christmas Memory #1 - Elementary School Christmas Song

(This is the meager little Christmas tree we had our first Christmas together...

and is still the only one we have.)

Whenever anyone says, "Merry Christmas," I immediately think of my elementary school Christmas song. Part of it goes like this, "Merry Christmas, Orem Elementary! May your Christmas be all that it's meant to be."  That always gets stuck in my head. 

I don't know if it's a common thing for elementary schools to have Christmas songs, like maybe you have to have a school Christmas song before you can officially function as an elementary school? But my school definitely had one. We had a Christmas assembly and all the kids in the whole school would gather in the auditorium where they had this huge Christmas tree and we would sing our Christmas song, each grade with its own special verse. I remember the first time I ever sang it; it's probably one of my first clear Christmas memories. There I was, a puny kindergartener (I've always been small, but in kindergarten I was super puny), sitting next to my friend and next door neighbor Amelia (who was taller than I was then but is smaller than I am now - I even remember the day we noticed I was taller) and staring up at the enormous tree and over that crowd of kids who were all way bigger than I was, feeling a sort of trepidatious excitement as the other kindergarteners and I got ready to belt out our verse, hoping I wouldn't get the words wrong, and wondering in a sort of vague confusion why it was we were singing a song to our school building. I thought maybe even inanimate objects needed a little Christmas cheer.

The problem with this memory is that for years I couldn't remember any other part of the song than the one I quoted above and the very end: "...a merry Christmas, Orem Elemen-ta-ry!" So this year I utilized the magical world of Facebook and asked my fellow Orem Elementary alumni to help put together all the pieces. We're not sure we've got everything right, but we're pretty sure it goes something like this (pretty sure the kindergarten line is wrong):

Merry Christmas, Orem Elementary!
May your Christmas be all that it's meant to be,
As we gather 'round the Christmas tree,
A merry Christmas Orem Elemen-ta-ry!
The kids in kindergarten are ready to get started
The children in the first, are just about to burst.
The children in the second, are hoping and expectin'.
The carols down in third are the best you've ever heard.
The children in the fourth are spreading cheer of course.
The children in the fifth are making Christmas gifts.
The kids down in sixth are playing Christmas Tricks!
Through out the school we'll have a happy yule!
A merry Christmas Orem Elemen-ta-ry!

Years later in college I reconnected with some friends from elementary school. I remember sitting with them at Wingers where we often went to eat and talk, and someone brought up the old elementary school Christmas song. Trying to remember the words and laughing over our mistakes while eating hot taco soup on a cold day - that's a good Christmas memory too.

Celebration: Baby, It's Cold Outside. Even in Vegas.

Although there is no sign of snow in Vegas, it has actually been pretty chilly. So I'm celebrating that the elements are giving me at least that much Christmas spirit. In honor of the cold(ish) weather, here is a little Christmas treasure complements of Gap and my good friend Carrie who shared this on her blog last Christmas (or the one before that?)



Ah, isn't that fun? Carrie, I miss you.

Celebration: The Christmas Season, Baby!

I can't stand how happy I am that it's the Christmas season. It makes me so happy I can't sit still. I'm listening to Christmas music and dancing all over our apartment. Maybe I can count it as my exercise? I've always loved Christmas, but I think the last few years I've developed as much excitement for the Christmas season as I used to get as a kid. Who knows why? Just one day it started feeling completely magical again.

Another thing that's changed is I've mostly embraced the cheesy nature of Christmas music. I remember sitting in the car with my parents and plugging my ears and moaning through most of the Christmas music played on FM100 or whatever station it was. Now I've got a Pandora Radio station filled with loads of cheesy Christmas music (though I still can't handle some of it - really, there's a limit, Brian McKnight) and I'm LOVING it. My favorite Christmas song right now is Stevie Wonder's "One Little Christmas Tree." I discovered it in our iTunes library my first Christmas with Jordan and I can't believe I'd never heard it before. (I'm so glad I married Jordan so my Christmas music experience could be enriched...) So I'm sharing it with everyone today, the first day of December. Please embrace this cheesy wonder:

(Unfortunately I couldn't find one with a real music video. So sad. I bet if there were one, it would be AMAZING.)